Sunday, March 21, 2010

Oh The Humanity.

This is 2. This is 2 doing homework after procrastinating half the day. But this post isn't about homework or procrastinating. This post is about two situations involving me and 2 that made me laugh out loud so hard my stomach hurt. And they are doozies.

Situation 1: This one happened a few months ago. It has been stated that 2 is a fabulous-near perfect-easy to raise-joy to be around-teenager. Except for one glaring thing. HER ROOM. The fact that she can't keep her room clean and organized absolutely baffles me. But I choose my battles. And I can shut the door on that battle. Anyway, a few months ago 2 and I were at Hobby Lobby, browsing to our heart's content. I had lost track of her as we were browsing on different aisles. All of a sudden, 2 came running up to me, her eyes lit up with excitement, waiving a small white item in her hand like it was $250,000.00 dollars. I honestly thought she was going to pass out with the excitement. "Mom!" she shouted, right in my face "Look at this!" at this point she is waving the small white thing in loopy circles so quickly I can't even see it. I grab her wrist. I look at the small white thing. The small white thing is a hook. One small white hook. "Now I can keep my room clean because I will have somewhere to hang my backpack!"

The thought briefly flashes through my mind that I should nod supportively and agree. But I can't. I honestly can't. I start laughing out loud and then she starts laughing out loud and then we both are laughing so hard right in the middle of Hobby Lobby that we can't stop.

Like that little white hook is going to save that room of hers.

We bought the hook. At the time of this writing her room is a disaster and her backpack is on the floor.

Situation 2: This one happened yesterday. I try to date my daughters. I try to take them out one at a time for some mother-daughter bonding fun as often as I can. Yesterday it was 2's turn, and we went to Ikea. We do love our Ikea. On the way home in the car, we are talking and listening to music and having a great time. During all of this, she is of course texting non-stop.

Another battle I don't pick. She was there with me, she is a good girl, I tolerate the texting.

ANYWAY, all of a sudden she let out a disgusted little groan. "What is it?" I asked. "Oh, it's just this boy, we are just friends but he is acting weird today" She lamented. "It must be because he is back with Penelope." "Who is Penelope?" I ask.

At this point 2 gets the most superior, holier-than-thou look I have ever seen her muster, and states in the most positively judgemental and ridiculing tone I have ever heard "She is a CHEERLEADER."

The thought briefly flashes through my head that I should just nod and be supportive.
But I can't. I just can't. Why can't I?

2 is a Cheerleader. At the same school. On the same squad. She has just recently made the varsity cheer squad for the 2010-2011 school year and must have forgotten during her moment of superiority.

That, my friends, is hilarious. When she realized what she had said, we both started laughing and laughed all the way home.

Oh 2. Don't ever change.

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