Monday, May 6, 2013

Bullying For Grownups.

Please excuse the A word here, I'm mortally offended by it.  Not really.  But sorry if you are.


I've been asked by a few people about my anti-bullying stance which 
I briefly alluded too during one of my recent posts.

Please allow me to explain.

People, the world has changed.

I have been realizing that so much more lately.
Not very many people care about anyone but themselves, and their feelings.

That may seem like a bold statement, but think about it.
Think really, really hard about it.

And of course it is because of the evolution of society, but
mostly it's because of technology.  And the idea that everyone is some kind of
star and everyone else wants to know everything they are doing and thinking.
And then everyone gets caught up in that and then they think they really are
more important than other people.

It's kind of a vicious cycle.  And we all get caught up in it, even me.

But that's not really what I was talking about, even though it's true.

I was talking about people demanding you be a certain person or a 
certain way or they won't be your friend.

Grown up people!

I mean, I could NOT imagine approaching someone and saying to them:
"What I want to do is write a list of everything you have ever done wrong
and everything wrong about you and then after we talk about it we can be friends."

I have never done anything like that in my life and I never will....
but that kind of stuff happens nowdays,
it totally does.

How do I know?  Because it happened to me.

I was blown away to say the least.  
And then I politely declined and wished that person good luck in life.  

Because I do my best to be nice and be a good person and
serve others and be a good friend and if my imperfect self
isn't good enough, then please don't be my friend.

Thank you.

And it kind of gets worse.

I was asking someone else "Who DOES something that crazy?"
"I am happy being this person's friend, going forward and being happy, I would NEVER
think so much of myself to say this type of thing to someone, it's obnoxious!"

And she said: "Someone who wants to work on their relationship."
and "The sign of maturity is forgiving over and over and over and over and over no
matter how badly someone treats you"

And I was blown away even more.
I mean forgiveness, sure.  That's a given.
But involvement?  No thank you.

That's not maturity people, that's putting yourself in a position to be bullied.

And getting bullied over and over and over and over again,
and allowing your children, family, friends, what have you, to
be affected by it, all the while forgiving and loving and accepting that person,
over and over and over and over and over again......that's not maturity, that's foolishness.

And at some point, it sets a horrible example and precedent for your entire family.
That's not what Jesus wants for us.

It isn't.

Because Jesus loves us.  And he want's us to be nice to each other. And he wants us to be happy.
He doesn't want us to be beat down.
By anyone.

So to sum up, here's my take:
I would love to be friends with you.
But if you don't like me, just how I am,
then don't be my friend.

Trust me, I will live.

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